In a world that thrives on constant connectivity, the idea of spending time alone can seem intimidating. Yet, learning to be comfortable with yourself is an invaluable skill that fosters personal growth, emotional stability, and a deeper understanding of one’s own needs and desires. In this blog post, we’ll dive deeper into the value and steps to embrace solitude.
The Value of Solitude
Solitude is often misunderstood as loneliness, but the two are distinct. While loneliness is the feeling of being disconnected from others, solitude is the state of being alone without feeling lonely. It’s a conscious choice to spend time with oneself, providing an opportunity for self-reflection, creativity, and inner peace. Let’s discover some of the benefits of solitude:
1. Self-Discovery
Time alone allows you to explore your thoughts and feelings without external influences. This self-awareness is crucial for personal development and leaves room for complete honesty without any need for embarrassment. Open up to yourself, reveal yourself, and invest in discovering your true being. Spending time alone helps you get to know and love yourself as you relearn to value your own company.
2. Enhanced Creativity
Many great artists and thinkers have found that solitude sparks creativity. When you’re alone, your mind has the freedom to wander, making connections and generating new ideas. This can open up new perspectives and provide freedom. Experiencing solitude also means not being tied to anyone else, not needing to worry about someone else’s opinion in the present moment. This allows you to fully let go of any boundaries holding you back.
3. Emotional Well-being
Solitude can help you process emotions, reduce stress, and improve your mental health. How? You may ask. Doesn’t this sound controversial at first, implying that solitude leaves many people feeling lonely? Well, if you learn to really embrace solitude, you will see its benefits in regulating emotions as you learn to handle them all on your own. Get to know your emotions, love and embrace them, and start to feel complete all by yourself. Solitude provides a break from the demands of social interactions, allowing you to recharge.
4. Improved Relationships
What we just said leads to the next aspect of improved relationships. Understanding and valuing your own company makes you less dependent on others for validation, which can lead to healthier, more fulfilling relationships.
As said, you’ll learn to feel complete and happy all on your own. This also allows you to become an independent person, a someone if you want. A someone is a person others look up to. Why? A someone is a person full of character, independent and strong, not with others by need but by choice. Being with another person by choice doesn’t mean loving them less because you don’t need them, as well this doesn’t mean everyone you want to spend time with just instantly falls for you; it means you value their presence and love their true being, without relying on them for your happiness.
Nonetheless, ending up in a relationship of any kind with this person includes that these feelings are based on reciprocity. Choosing to be with someone because you genuinely appreciate them results in more meaningful relationships. Learn to become a someone.
Steps to Embrace Solitude
1. Start Small
If you’re not used to spending time alone, start with short periods. This might sound over the top, but spending time alone can be hard at first. Many people don’t know what to do when they’re on their own, which leads to boredom and negative experiences that will be associated with solitude in the future. Dedicate 10-15 minutes a day to being with yourself. Gradually increase this time as you become more comfortable. Once you learn to love and value your own presence, the time you dedicate to yourself will increase rapidly on its own, trust me.
2. Create a Comfortable Space
Designate a space where you feel relaxed and comfortable. This could be a cozy corner of your home, a park, or any place where you can be undisturbed. Filling this space with items that bring you joy, such as books, candles, or art supplies, enables you to create your ultimate place of retreat dedicated to restoration and recharging. This will leave you feeling energized as it represents a form of resting, which ultimately results in higher efficiency, better concentration, improved social interactions, higher resilience, and overall happiness and fulfillment.
3. Engage in Activities You Enjoy
Use your alone time to engage in hobbies or activities that you love. In our fast-paced reality, pursuing hobbies rarely gets the highest priority. But hobbies allow us to calm down and forget everyday life’s stress, even if just for a moment. They leave you feeling good as you accomplish something you are good at, do something you enjoy or constantly improve. Whether it’s reading, painting, writing, or gardening, doing something you enjoy can make solitude more appealing. Engaging in an activity you love helps you feel less alone and sorts your thoughts during tough times.
4. Practice Mindfulness
Mindfulness exercises like meditation or deep breathing can help you stay present and fully experience the moment. You will learn to experience the present as well as your presence in a different way. We’ve said it before, clearly know not everyone is thrilled to try meditation. What we actually mean is to engage in a moment of silence, a moment of fully focus on yourself. You can do this during designated practice times or on a walk, on your way to work or school. Try to feel every inch of your body or look around the place you’re at, do you notice any details you’ve missed before?
These practices can reduce anxiety and enhance your ability to enjoy your own company by helping you realize things you haven’t before. You’ll see how many things you’re overlooking in everyday life, many things of which you might enjoy some.
5. Reflect and Journal
Writing down your thoughts and feelings is a powerful way to understand yourself better. This may feel unusual or weird at first and might even seem weak to some, but it’s not. Writing your feelings down doesn’t just help you understand them better; it shows you that you truly try to accept them.
Feelings are unpredictable, and not all of them are desirable. Still, writing them all down will lead to a deep connection and acceptance of your being. Besides negative feelings, our thoughts can be drenched in grief and envy. These might reveal easily at times, but most often they hide in high security encryption. In both cases, writing them down and acknowledging them will help you move forward.
You can start analyzing where your thoughts or feelings come from and find their true intentions. This way you can work on deep lying issues that might conquer you. Keep a journal to document your experiences, insights, and progress as you spend more time alone. In the end, look back at it and smile, seeing how far you’ve come.
6. Disconnect from Technology
Constant digital connectivity can be a major barrier to solitude. Why? Because it represents the very opposite. Try to disconnect from your devices during your alone time. This allows you to fully engage with yourself without distractions.
Constant reachability is stressful. Wherever you go, you need to be prepared for a call, a text, a post; don’t forget, always take pictures to show others what you did, of places, of people, of art, of food, of a rainy day, of a stupid sentence, of people arguing, of people fighting, of an accident, of yourself in a toilet mirror. Many don’t actively realize the pressure this puts on their mental well-being.
Try to escape that for the time being with yourself. At first, many who use their phones a lot will have a hard time knowing what to do. This is your number one sign that designated time to disconnect from screens should be part of your everyday routine. People who use nothing but their phones lose interest in hobbies, friends, and movement. Instead they get constant overstimulation, depression from a lessstimulating real life, and feelings of loneliness when seeing others online appear “better.” Disconnection and solitude will help you experience the joy of real life again.
These steps will lead to solitude taking a beneficial role in your life. It’s a journey that requires patience, practice, and a shift in perspective. Remember, solitude is not about isolating yourself from the world; it’s about reconnecting with your inner self and finding peace in your own company. So, take a deep breath, embrace the quiet moments, and enjoy the journey of getting to know the most important person in your life – you. Experience the freedom and artistry that solitude brings, just as in a children’s scribble.